


i only wrote this down to make you press rewind

by Olsies



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Foster kids, Future Fic, Gen, M/M, PTSD, fake fix it fluff thing, i had a lot of feelings about fantastic beasts and needed to talk about them, idk - Freeform, what better way than to project my feelings onto a fictional character?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-14
Updated: 2017-05-14
Packaged: 2018-10-31 21:29:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10907823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Olsies/pseuds/Olsies
Summary: Andrew has a lot of feelings after his and Neil's foster kids make them watchFantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.





	i only wrote this down to make you press rewind

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sheerpoetry](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sheerpoetry/gifts).



> fantastic beasts and where to find them spoilers!

It was supposed to be an easy, simple night in. After a good week, the three kids Neil and Andrew were fostering asked for pizza and to rent _Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them_. They didn’t give it much thought since they had barely seen any of the other Harry Potter movies, much less read the books, and just thought they were harmless little kid stories.

And at first it was just cute. The little niffler getting loose, Jacob Kowalski being confused AF (as the kids kept saying), and then Credence happened. Neil kept glancing at Andrew the more the story unfolded, but Andrew said nothing, just crossed his arms and frowned. He stopped laughing, stopped contributing to the conversation, and almost snapped when Lisa laughed a little too loudly at the Demiguise. The other two kids, Jack and Heather, glanced at him, smiles gone. They looked at Neil and he shrugged, shaking his head but not taking his eyes off the TV.

When Credence died and the no-majs were oblivated, Andrew excused himself to the kitchen and didn’t come back. The kids kept glancing at the kitchen and Neil but said nothing about Andrew’s reaction, just talked about how much they loved the movie, and how sad was it that Jacob only half remembered Queenie, like she was in a dream. After twenty minutes, Neil told them all to go to bed. They offered to clean up, but Neil just looked at the dark kitchen, and shook his head.

“No, guys, it’s ok. Just- just go to bed. Brush your teeth, and all that…” Neil said.

“Is Andrew ok?” Lisa asked, and Neil bit his lip.

“No, no he’s not. Just- just go to bed, ok?” He paused. “Hopefully things will be better in the morning.” The kids nodded and walked upstairs silently. Neil went to the kitchen, but didn’t turn on the light. He could see Andrew sitting in the chair, not moving. “Can I come in?” He asked and Andrew took a deep breath.

“Yes.” Neil walked in and stood by the table.

“Can I sit down?” Andrew kicked the chair from under the table. It clipped Neil’s knee but he said nothing, didn’t even wince, he just sat down.

“Wanna talk?” Andrew snorted. “Newt was so good, wasn’t he?”

“Real fucking hero. Too bad he couldn’t save the fucking kid.” Andrew scoffed. Neil bit his lip. “I need a cigarette.” Neil frowned. Andrew hadn’t smoked in years.

“We’re fresh out,” Neil said. Andrew didn’t say anything. “Talk to me.” Andrew put his head on the table and sat back up.

“No.”

“Should I call Bee?” Neil asked. He didn’t need the lights on to know that Andrew was glaring at him.

“It doesn’t matter.” It was Neil’s turn to scoff.

“Clearly. You’re not at all affected by Credence. You’re totally fine, not sitting in the dark in the kitchen…”

“Shut up, Neil,” Andrew growled.

“I thought we were past that,” Neil muttered and got up. Andrew put his arm out to stop him, not touching him.

“He just fucking deserved better.” Neil stood there, looking down at his partner. “He- he deserved better, Neil.” They were silent.

“Andrew, I-” He started and stopped. “You know what you’re saying, right?” Andrew said nothing, just put his head in his arms. Neil watched him for a moment. “Yes or no?” At first Andrew said nothing, and then he nodded into his arms.

“Yes,” he sat up and shoved his face into Neil’s stomach. Neil pulled him close, rubbing the back of his neck.

“You’re safe now, you’re safe now. I’ve got you,” Neil said, not sure of what else to say. It wasn’t like Andrew to have such intense feelings about a fictional character but he wasn’t going to tell Andrew his feelings were stupid. The movie was really disturbing, especially as all their friends had just said it was a cute fluffy thing, when clearly there was a much harsher story.

Andrew didn’t cry, but he clung to Neil in a way that he hadn’t since they first got together, just after Baltimore.

“We’re safe now, Andrew,” Neil finally said. “And we’re gonna find all the Credences we can, and we’re going to help them be safe, too.” Andrew nodded, clung harder. Neil rubbed his back. “Can I get you anything? Do you need a drink?” Andrew scoffed.

“I already finished off the vodka. Surprised you can’t smell it.” Neil laughed a little.

“Are you ready to go to bed?” Neil asked. Andrew nodded and let Neil go. He stood up, stretched and leaned close to his partner, leaning on him. “Doin’ ok?”

“Little dizzy,” Andrew admitted. “We had a lot of vodka left. Been awhile since I drank this much...” Neil chuckled a little.

“Come on, let’s go to bed,” Neil said. Andrew leaned on him as they went up the stairs. They made a pit stop to the bathroom, and then Andrew fell face first on the bed. Neil expected him to start snoring, but Andrew just curled up on his side, pulling a pillow close to him. “Feet,” Neil said and Andrew rolled on his back throwing his feet in the air. They had agreed a long time ago that Andrew could sleep in his clothes if he wanted, but not his shoes. Neil had enough bruises from Exy, he didn’t need more. After taking off his shoes, Neil grabbed his own pajamas and changed in the closet where he could turn the light on and not bother Andrew too much. Clicking off the light, he crawled into bed next to Andrew.

Neil thought he was asleep, but then Andrew said in a small voice, “Yes or no?”

“Yes,” Neil said and Andrew surprised Neil by just brushing his fingertips across Neil’s hand and wrist.

“They didn’t care, Neil. Not really. Tina probably cared the most, or maybe Newt. But. His life didn’t really mean anything. He was just a plot tool,” Andrew whispered into the darkness. Neil lay there for a few minutes, just breathing and letting Andrew trace shapes into the palm of his hand.

“Your life matters,” Neil finally whispered, and Andrew stopped for a moment and kept going.

“Shut up, stupid,” he growled but kissed Neil’s palm. Neil pulled away and turned on the light.

“You know that, right? You know your life matters? That you matter?” Neil asked. Andrew glowered at him.

“I said, shut up. I don’t want to talk about this.” He reached over Neil, turned off the light, and curled up on his side facing away from Neil. Neil turned the light back on, but Andrew didn’t move.

“Andrew.” Silence. “I thought- I thought-” He paused and watched his partner pretending to sleep. Neil sighed. “This isn’t over,” he whispered, turned out the light and flopped on his side facing the door. If Andrew was going to ignore him, he was going to ignore Andrew right back.

***

“Neil,” Andrew whispered and Neil instantly woke up. It was late. Or early. He’d only been asleep a few hours.

“What?” He asked.

“You thought what?” Neil blinked back sleep, fighting to remember.

“Oh. I thought you were past thinking you were nothing. I thought you and Bee had sorted that out a long time ago. I thought-” He stopped himself again. Andrew lay behind him, mere inches away, carefully not touching. “It doesn’t matter what I think.” He rolled over to face Andrew in the dark. “Not about this. What matters is what you think.” Andrew said nothing, barely breathed. “I guess it’s never going to be over, is it?”

“What?”

“Your childhood.” Andrew didn’t say anything for a long time.

“No,” he finally croaked out. “But neither is yours.” He paused, but Neil didn’t argue for once. “Yes or no?”

“Yes, Andrew.” Andrew scooted closer, kissed Neil on the mouth, and rested his forehead against the other man’s.

“Thank you,” Andrew finally said and Neil finally felt him relax. When he woke up again, Andrew was gone but he could smell bacon and could hear their foster kids bickering about something unimportant, Neil was sure. He yawned, stretched, and wandered down stairs. Andrew looked up at the sound of his approach, smiled a very small almost not smile, and slapped Lisa’s hand away with the greasy spatula in his hand.

“No stealing bacon! You know the rules!” Lisa wiped the grease off her hand, hissing a little.

“You’re such a grouch, Andrew,” she whined. “Neil, make him give me a piece!” Neil laughed and Andrew scoffed.

“You know the rules,” he said simply and sat down with the other two, watching as Andrew added a waffle to a large stack. Jack got out the juice and started up the coffee while they waited, and Neil couldn’t help but watch Andrew and just shake his head a little. This man, this man that he loved never ceased to amaze him, and he did his best, and Neil just couldn’t help but feel happy. Sure, Andrew was going through things, but Andrew was always, and would always be going through things. _Recovery is a trip, Neil, not a destination,_ Andrew had once said, years before when Neil had woken up from a bad dream and Neil had been angry at himself. He should have been over Baltimore, his father. Those people couldn’t get him any more. But Andrew had been there to help him through it. And the words didn’t mean much to him at the time, but now it was finally making sense.

Andrew put a plate of waffles in front of Neil, his fingers brushing over his shoulder as he turned to get more.

“Thank you,” Neil said, but his words were lost in the din of the kitchen. This wasn’t the end, and he was sure Andrew was going to tell Bee about it eventually, and things were probably going to be up and down for a while, but for now they were up, and there was bacon, so he was just going to have to accept it for now, and that was that.


End file.
